Oh, very lovely. I like how it does allow the imagination to wander, even if I'm left with the feeling of having the details spoon-fed to me.
One little note (as I let my Grammar-Nazi gremlin out to play for a moment) is that you still use "then" in places you should use "than". For example: "do his work with less thenthan five paper cuts".
But, with that said, nice little story. I'm going to run many scenarios through my head tonight. *g*
chase_acow
Renae
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Date: 2006-06-23 01:03 am (UTC)One little note (as I let my Grammar-Nazi gremlin out to play for a moment) is that you still use "then" in places you should use "than". For example: "do his work with less
thenthan five paper cuts".But, with that said, nice little story. I'm going to run many scenarios through my head tonight. *g*