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chase_acowMcKay/Sheppard
angst & AU
~800 words
PG-13 for curse words
McKay bounced off the small bunk and straight at John the second the door opened. He preemptively crossed his arms over his chest and set his eyes at a point just beside McKay’s left ear. He kept his face contorted in a careful mask of boredom as he watched McKay flash from relief to fear and confusion.
“What’s going on?” McKay asked wringing his hands together in front of his stomach and watching John through wide eyes. He was pale, and the emergency lighting gave a blue tint to his skin washing him out even more.
Sighing, John ran his hand through his hair. He could smell the stale sweat that filled the room; he just wasn’t sure whether the majority came from him or McKay. He shifted to put his back against the doorframe so he wouldn’t have to watch McKay as he spoke, “The Apollo contacted us five minutes ago. We’re moving all personnel to the Gateroom in preparation for beam out.”
“So we’re just going to abandon Atlantis?” McKay interrupted him angrily, and even though John couldn’t see him, knew that there were accompanying gestures.
John pivoted and glared down his nose at the other man, feeling his mask slip for a heartbeat before reining himself in. “We are engaging in a strategic retreat that happens to be the only option we have besides a painful and imminent death,” he said coldly wishing desperately that there had been any other way.
“Let me fix this, John,” McKay pleaded and reached out to carefully touch his fingers to the material covering John’s bicep. “I can make it up to you.”
“I think you’ve done enough,” John said, slowly sliding out from under McKay’s hand. He felt hollow and cold knowing that it was just him now. He looked straight at McKay, letting his disdain show clearly. “And I think you’ve lost the right to call me ‘John’ anymore.”
McKay flinched backward as if struck and turned his head down and to the side. “I did what I thought was best, Colonel,” he said softly.
“You did what you fucking wanted to do, McKay,” John snarled, suddenly willing to show his anger in the face of McKay’s quietness. They always had been contrary, never on the same page at the same time. “Just like you always do! Jesus!”
“I’m sorry, what more do you want me to say?” McKay asked quietly, all the fight gone out of him. His broad shoulders slumped into an arc, an equation made of pain and misery.
John drew himself up; let his spine harden and thought about all the people that were depending on him alone now. Elizabeth was dead, and Atlantis was dying and all his people had was one fucked up military commander to get them out. He turned his head and spoke over his shoulder, “Sergeants, please escort Dr. McKay to the Gateroom. Once on the Apollo take him immediately to the brig. Do not pass go, and do not collect two-hundred dollars. Am I understood?”
“Yes sir!” twin replies came through the door.
Nodding to himself, John rubbed his eyes and scrubbed his hand down his chin. He heard the rasp of too long stubble. “McKay, I’ll deal with you when I can stand to look to look at you again,” he said and gestured toward the door.
“What would you have done?” McKay demanded suddenly, the words exploding from his mouth like projectiles.
“I would have followed Elizabeth’s wishes!” John exploded not caring who heard him. “You know that we all have our lines, and you had no right to cross it. You haven’t been almost turned into a bug, sucked dry by the Wraith, or controlled by nanites! You had no right!”
“So you killed her.” McKay said bitterly, his mouth twisted into a jagged line. “You didn’t even wait to see if it worked.”
Before he knew it, John was moving. “See that’s it, right there!” John yelled, fisting his hands into McKay’s jacket and shoving him back against the wall. Rodney when pliant under his hands, breathing heavily but not meeting John’s eyes. “You don’t even care that Elizabeth was basically dead before Keller even operated, and goddamn you for making me pull the trigger again, you just care that you didn’t get the chance to prove what a big brain you are.”
“Fuck you,” McKay snarled, his chin still digging into his chest.
“Not likely,” John said softly not anymore and backed away gesturing to the two sergeants who had poked their heads in at all the noise. “Take him, but keep him separated from the rest.”
McKay glared as he shoved past John and swept out of the room, letting the two marines fall into step behind him.
angst & AU
~800 words
PG-13 for curse words
McKay bounced off the small bunk and straight at John the second the door opened. He preemptively crossed his arms over his chest and set his eyes at a point just beside McKay’s left ear. He kept his face contorted in a careful mask of boredom as he watched McKay flash from relief to fear and confusion.
“What’s going on?” McKay asked wringing his hands together in front of his stomach and watching John through wide eyes. He was pale, and the emergency lighting gave a blue tint to his skin washing him out even more.
Sighing, John ran his hand through his hair. He could smell the stale sweat that filled the room; he just wasn’t sure whether the majority came from him or McKay. He shifted to put his back against the doorframe so he wouldn’t have to watch McKay as he spoke, “The Apollo contacted us five minutes ago. We’re moving all personnel to the Gateroom in preparation for beam out.”
“So we’re just going to abandon Atlantis?” McKay interrupted him angrily, and even though John couldn’t see him, knew that there were accompanying gestures.
John pivoted and glared down his nose at the other man, feeling his mask slip for a heartbeat before reining himself in. “We are engaging in a strategic retreat that happens to be the only option we have besides a painful and imminent death,” he said coldly wishing desperately that there had been any other way.
“Let me fix this, John,” McKay pleaded and reached out to carefully touch his fingers to the material covering John’s bicep. “I can make it up to you.”
“I think you’ve done enough,” John said, slowly sliding out from under McKay’s hand. He felt hollow and cold knowing that it was just him now. He looked straight at McKay, letting his disdain show clearly. “And I think you’ve lost the right to call me ‘John’ anymore.”
McKay flinched backward as if struck and turned his head down and to the side. “I did what I thought was best, Colonel,” he said softly.
“You did what you fucking wanted to do, McKay,” John snarled, suddenly willing to show his anger in the face of McKay’s quietness. They always had been contrary, never on the same page at the same time. “Just like you always do! Jesus!”
“I’m sorry, what more do you want me to say?” McKay asked quietly, all the fight gone out of him. His broad shoulders slumped into an arc, an equation made of pain and misery.
John drew himself up; let his spine harden and thought about all the people that were depending on him alone now. Elizabeth was dead, and Atlantis was dying and all his people had was one fucked up military commander to get them out. He turned his head and spoke over his shoulder, “Sergeants, please escort Dr. McKay to the Gateroom. Once on the Apollo take him immediately to the brig. Do not pass go, and do not collect two-hundred dollars. Am I understood?”
“Yes sir!” twin replies came through the door.
Nodding to himself, John rubbed his eyes and scrubbed his hand down his chin. He heard the rasp of too long stubble. “McKay, I’ll deal with you when I can stand to look to look at you again,” he said and gestured toward the door.
“What would you have done?” McKay demanded suddenly, the words exploding from his mouth like projectiles.
“I would have followed Elizabeth’s wishes!” John exploded not caring who heard him. “You know that we all have our lines, and you had no right to cross it. You haven’t been almost turned into a bug, sucked dry by the Wraith, or controlled by nanites! You had no right!”
“So you killed her.” McKay said bitterly, his mouth twisted into a jagged line. “You didn’t even wait to see if it worked.”
Before he knew it, John was moving. “See that’s it, right there!” John yelled, fisting his hands into McKay’s jacket and shoving him back against the wall. Rodney when pliant under his hands, breathing heavily but not meeting John’s eyes. “You don’t even care that Elizabeth was basically dead before Keller even operated, and goddamn you for making me pull the trigger again, you just care that you didn’t get the chance to prove what a big brain you are.”
“Fuck you,” McKay snarled, his chin still digging into his chest.
“Not likely,” John said softly not anymore and backed away gesturing to the two sergeants who had poked their heads in at all the noise. “Take him, but keep him separated from the rest.”
McKay glared as he shoved past John and swept out of the room, letting the two marines fall into step behind him.
